Showing posts with label unique minds. Show all posts
Showing posts with label unique minds. Show all posts

Saturday, May 9, 2015

Still Squeezing By?


I turn 62 next week, and for a few weeks now, lots has been going wrong and lots going right. At this ripe age, part of me still wants to find the formula that will give me a smooth ride. Do I actually want a smooth ride? Not sure. A friend said recently he thought I was a "rebel" according to Gretchen Rubin's book Better Than Before. A rebel being someone who needs her own reason for doing everything, and is not motivated without that key element being part of the landscape. That sounds truer.

Anyway, I have something a little slippery to talk about today, that seems somehow linked to this rebel theme. As an artist, I do batik, silk and bamboo dyeing and patterning, silk painting and shibori mostly, and also teach these skills. My edge is always the juice of discovery and pushing the tide of creativity, both for me and my students. 

I completed a commissioned piece recently that I was unsatisfied with and preceded to do another, closer to my own aesthetic. This was better, but problems arose and in resolving them, I was pushed even further into creating a edgier, more beautiful but risky "art piece." Sure I wanted to please my customer, but the demand of life and art for me to be coherent with who I am/what I am doing as an artist and a connected spiritual being was much stronger.

After years of spiritual journey and believing in the value of inner coherence and transparency, has life finally called me out to stand in this space, and only in this space? Yikes- no more sliding or squeezing by!  

This "inner demand" seems to be everywhere in my life these days. Where before, I was satisfied to be pleasant and easy sometimes for others, now I must find a way to voice what's true for me. And this urge has no regard for how hard this might be, considering I value kindness, too. Is this aging? I think it is for me. Aging seems to be about getting very clear and living it.

Case in point. I'm preparing to facilitate Conscious Aging workshops here in Pennsylvania, and as I study for the certification, I am also beginning to look for partners, places to host the workshops. Although I am very excited about the program, I am getting very little response to my "well crafted" positive emails. 

What's missing? I think its life once again, demanding I have the courage and clarity that the program will demand from its participants, and I'm not quite there yet myself. I've been thinking and saying these kinds of thoughts for so long, while able to slide around a little and chose where to live them and where to slide. Maybe the easy ride is over, replaced with juicy opportunities that offer much deeper satisfaction, along with coherence.

This is a slippery idea. On one hand, I wish to be compassionate toward myself, honor where I am and be transparent in connecting with myself and other people. On the other hand, I am in this spot of inner demand, until I am not. Perhaps I've created no way back. You know the idea that life insists you live at the level of your understanding? Well perhaps life thinks I've had enough wiggle room.

Here's what it looks like now: 

  1. Being conscious of what I am feeling whenever I don't feel wonderful. 
  2. Take the time to feel and understand what I am feeling, and probably say it out loud, without concern for how long it takes. 
  3. Then look at my wholeness, the entire landscape of all the conflicting feelings and needs, order them up and act in an way that's fully in coherence to all of it.
At 62, am I old enough and skilled enough to know myself a little, willing enough, to be clear, coherent and transparent?

There is some relief and comfort inside, that I finally get to do this. That I give it to myself as a big gift. A mature gift, not for the wimpy part, or the 8 year old part of me.

Is this true for you, too? I would love to hear about it.



Tuesday, February 18, 2014

Extreme Diversity as Art and Contribution


I saw something in passing today that gave me what felt like an electric bolt in my heart. Browsing on the TED site for talks about aging and creativity I saw this:

Temple Grandin: The world needs all kinds  of minds  (http://www.ted.com/talks/temple_grandin_the_world_needs_all_kinds_of_minds.html). 
Here's the TED blurb about the talk: 
Temple Grandin, diagnosed with autism as a child, talks about how her mind works -- sharing her ability to "think in pictures," which helps her solve problems that neurotypical brains might miss. She makes the case that the world needs people on the autism spectrum: visual thinkers, pattern thinkers, verbal thinkers, and all kinds of smart geeky kids.

What she's speaking about is an idea I have always naturally believed and find myself growing in my engagement with Alzheimer’s and Dementia folks in my Art for Special Seniors classes. I am doing these classes because I can, and I have great patience for this population. But the truer, deeper reason is that I am so excited about the idea that everyone is a contributor: that the perspective offered by every single person, especially those with off-center or unacceptable worldviews, is unique, important and in need of full expression. 

I love the senior and altered mind populations and create methods, exercises and artistic journeys that allow those without a trusted voice to actually look at what they see, hear and feel and express it. It's great art to me! Like Van Gogh, or Modigliani, there is a unique eye/ear/experience here asking to be spoken.  I find myself holding my breath as she expresses what a curve in her drawing feels like, or why he chose this particular picture to add to a collage. It’s all about nuance and my experience is that these expressed nuances are valuable to well being and contribute to the whole in unseen ways. So, in a sense, it’s about empowering the ability of each person to distinguish what is perceived, and to express it. Which is also my own deeper journey, I guess, of always becoming more conscious and expressed. Thoughts need space to move and complete themselves.

Taking this thought further, what if Alzheimer’s could be seen, rather than just a disease, as a human adaptation, providing something the collective whole needs? Or, in expressing what IS there, greater quality of life is available and unimagined ideas can move and complete?

If you think this idea is superficial or dangerous? First consider: it is a unique eye to contribute to the art of life. It also gives voice to what’s here, reducing the frustration and fear that often accompanies illness. If I've learned anything as a human and an artist, it is that where you are in life at this very moment is important. Not where you or others think you should or could be. And mostly I've noticed that those with Alzheimer’s are having a way better time of it than their caregivers, who are usually stuck in should/was/isn't.

A comment under Temple's TED talk talks about a Danish man who is primarily employing people with Asberger’s syndrome. He found that it was perfectly possible for them to work commercially with tasks that required focus and dedication of a specialized mind. Not surprisingly one of their most valued services is intensive software testing and meticulous documentation. The hardest part for him was to make his employees go home from work and not work overtime.  Love it!

Grandin said we need to help students with unique minds be successful. And it starts by recognizing the value of each person as contribution. I am contemplating this idea as one of life's arts. Diversity expanded exponentially, as life keeps using those fractals to divide, mirror, alter and grow. What do you think?